I have this odd obsession with hopeless causes, and I always fear that I go for them in order to fail.
I tend to fall for women who are lesbians, taken, or too high maintenance. Why must I?
I spent the evening with my best friend. She continuously drove that I need two things to make my life better. A new wardrobe (classy clothes), and this new perfume she dubbed "Sexy Rich Man". I might take her up on the wardrobe thing. Spend 5 consecutive pay checks on clothes? I shudder at the thought! But she does have great fashion taste. And I could keep my crappy clothes for D&D and at home. Since I am presently wearing a shirt my ex whom-left-me-5-years-ago bought me.... certain changes could be made? We'll see. I wonder what the rest of the world thinks..not that anyone reads this.
Tomorrow I have an Ice fishing trip. I am excited and apprehensive. Excited for the 'fishing', but nervous because I'll have to interact with people whom most are not common in my life.
Maybe Trish and I are developing the same thing?
I also found out that the ex that tore my heart soul and self-worth to shreds which resulted in a mild misogynistic, and phobia of being confined, bit, scratched, and hit by women has a genetic condition in which results in partial or complete blindness. I don't know if what I feel is pity for the ruined woman, or elation for karma...
Perhaps there is a Hell, and I'll meet her there... where we'll be in a relationship for the rest of eternity...
Am I a bad person if I hope my two friends break-up, both become hurt and estranged just so I can attempt to date her? I think I may be.
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